i wanna be a lil rainbow... a colourful one =)

Thursday, September 03, 2009

I have finally decided to revive my blog... well, it died quite a few times alr, so i hope..... i'll be able to keep it going this time round!

anyway, today SJMM had fellowshipping! food, food and more food and reflections! i must say, i actually quite like the reflection part =) it realli helps us keep everything in track... (but even that, i was stoning most of the time)... until daddyGod carefully picked his time to speak to me... that is also the reason why i'm restarting my blog...

it was during the last part of this wed's fellowship, and we were singing the divine mercy... and as i went on singing :

"For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world"

I unknowingly started to pray for the whole world... and tears kept welling up in my eyes (i tried super hard to blink-dry them cuz its realli paiseh!)...

The sadness i felt was really strong, and i wept for:
- the little lives that were killed through the Human Embryonic Stem Cell Research (HESCR) which the whole wide world is so excited about...
- and also for the people who are still at it, doing it in the name of science, of medicine, of 'life' (ironically) and not realising how immoral they are being...
- the people who donated their eggs/sperms to this unethical act
- the governments who support it (tt's why we keep praying for governments on Sunday Masses)
- the people who fund it =(

and as i tried to stop tearing and sing properly, the message became crystal clear. i NEED to (in my little ways) be daddyGod's mouth and spread the msg that He so wants to tell His people... in fact, i think He must be thinking tt i'm such a blockhead alr! took me so long to receive His message!

now tt i'm slowly getting back into my fav topic, i recall the times daddyGod tried to speak through me (and i was so DENSE in my head i did not receive His message):
1. when i first heard of HESCR from my uncle (Dr. John Hui)... he's such an inspiration
2. little times when i happen to chance upon in on the web or catholic news...
3. my current posting to NUH Oncology (Stem Cell Transplantation)...
4. little adrenaline rush sometimes to search more abt HESCH or just SCR...

and so i pray, that daddyGod will continue to guide me to be wadever he wants me to be =)

gerry was here

2:52:00 AM

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Friday, March 28, 2008

PRAISE THE LORD!!!

seriously, i'll need to give extra praise to my dearest Daddy in Heaven... He's jus awesome... =) cant stop grinning now... throughout my whole life, He has given me sufficient help to get to where I am now... and I'm so going to dedicate my life to him, [currently, as an aspiring nurse]... He has made my paths so straight... I need not think too hard to make any decisions... As i have said before the results He offered me aint Fantastic... but they are sufficient...

like in my recent test on weds... I admit i didnt study... and weird, i felt no stress at all... to the other 4 TH Nurses, I'd prolly seemed at my maximum bo-chap state... i was like how relaxed as i saw them burying their heads in the notes while having breakfast...

anyway, i only studied 1 chapter and read through 2 chapters of the total of 8 chapters... and as usual, i said my favourite prayer which will only make me more confident (er, there was no confidence of my knowledge to speak about as i didnt study remb?)... i was the MOST confident student in the lecture theatre i dare say... While others are confident of the amount of pharmacology matter they managed to squeeze into their brainnn, i was... confident that Daddy God sent His Holy Spirit down to guide my pencil... i felt a certain sense of peace as i did the paper...

once, i wanted to shade False for part c, but i shaded for part d instead... and i decided, that must be right... (even though i tot d was True actually)... another time, i checked thru my answer and decided to change one of my answer to True, only to realised that i had already shaded it as true when i was supposed to shade false previously, and for many questions i jus had a strong feeling of the answer, even though i've got no idea what the question is talking about... =P

anyway, Praise the Lord once again, I got a D+ (which is a pass)... and not D, not D-, not F... See, shouldn't I praise the Lord?

With Christ in the Vessel I can Smile at the Storm
Smile at the Storm
Smile at the Storm
With Christ in the Vessel, I can Smile at the Storm
As We go Sailing Home!
Sailing, Sailing Home.
Sailing, Sailing Home.
With Christ in the Vessel, I can Smile at the Storm
As We go Sailing Home!

gerry was here

11:37:00 AM

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Saturday, March 15, 2008

okay... havent been here for quite sometime...
so, jus to update...

first up, TH Bazaar - THerapezia...
next up, binbin's death...

bazaar's from 12-14th March08, dunno is it lucky or suay, there are only 3 comms that actually set up a stall... and those 3 comms are coincidentally the only 3 comms i'm in... blarrr... so, for weds, 2hr for welfare, 2hr for hearts, thursday, 2 hr for productions, 2 hr for welfare... hahahah

ohh... then friday, had simulation, quite fun... jus tt i gave ventolin b4 the 6 hrs was up and didn tell the doc... oops =P

lastly, binbin died... =( damn sad... on weds night (120308) i was still playing with it... that cute little thing started swimming around at 3am, so i decided to try to feed it again... it chompped at the pallet at my hand, but as usual, didnt actually swallow much...

on thursday (130308) i somehow skipped lecture, prolly too tired... cuz the previous night only slept at 3.30am... didn go for physio... and finally when i woke up at 11am, i saw binbin sleeping in the water, so i picked it up and put it on its favourite rock =P but it felt weird, so i prodded it and it didnt move, i shoke it and it didn't get up... ... ... ... ... and never again...

initially i felt scared, and lost... i didnt noe wad to do... i'm all alone in this room with my beloved terrapin, now dead and lifeless... and......... i was playing with it last night! =(

i couldnt reply kw's msg of (how's binbin now?), so i called. and i couldnt help but cry and cry... and i msged qianwen and when she called, i continued... er... crying lor...

at tt moment, i also thanked God that i skipped lecture, for if i didnt, i wouldnt have found out binbin's death till 10pm that night... and it would have rotted in the water...

anyway,i made a paper coffin for it... and that night, tgt with kw and yi ling and the TH nurses, i went to the little field behind B1 to bury my dear one...

tks for all who were here and helped =)

haiz...very sad... when i look at the terrapin food on my table, i cant help but tear...
when i enter my room, the first thought on my mind is "hey binbin dear, i'm back! come, let me play with u!" ... only to be reminded by the cruel fact tt it isnt here anymore, and i'll cry for some time...
when i brought meimei to see binbin's grave, i also cant help but cry...
hmm... dunno how long will all this take... =(

its raining... ='( poor binbin is out there alone in the cold and darkness =(((

[dear daddyGod, do terrapins go to heaven? pls take care of binbin k? dun let him be bullied by other animals, if they do get to heaven =P... thankew... Amen]

gerry was here

9:32:00 PM

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Thursday, March 06, 2008

okok... long time since i posted something! =P life's been ok... jus done with IHG... we didnt win... but surely... next year, we shall come back stronger! =P well, it also means..... NO MORE DUTIES FOR WELFARE FOR IHG... heh... not like i HATE it... but... its jus good to get a breather from the 2 straight months of daily ihg stress... hee... =)

essay deadlines are stealthily approaching too... now they seem like ten miles away... but jus beware!!! in a blink of 2 eyes (er... i cant do that blink-of-an-eye... both blinks tgt k!), they're going to be jus right behind me! i had better start soon... no... I MUST start soon...

and for my physiology CA...expected... 40%... which means fail la!!! *shrugs* i cant help it what!!! *nose grows longer*... okok... i confess... i onli studied 1 out of 3 topics...

and hall points are out! i hope what little i have is enough to stay on... cant stand the thought of taking more than an hour to travel to school DAILY! *faints* and hall fees are more ex now...
me=poorgirl!

ohh!!! later got lab simulation... must go for class in my uniform...hahah... hope it doesnt invite to much stares at the TH busstop later~ *crosses fingers* wahaha... er, most imptly, hope i wun stone too much ltr... *freaks out* i'm damn blur la!!! how how how!!! later the maniquine patient die how??? I'M A MURDERER!!!

okok... i shall stop now... =P need to like do my tutorial? haha... (like how rare!) well, must do first cuz tmr morning needa support Conversion Experience Retreat 8... actually many times i feel like jus messaging aunty syl and tell her that i cant make it... (cuz to go tmr, tonight must go home & tmr afternn got sch somemore) but i refrained myself from doing that...

GET BEHIND ME SATAN...
talking about satan... i had a 'dream' on tuesday night, those sort of image-less dreams... onli noise... and it will get louder and louder till its unbearable! mostly, i'm semi-awake, but i jus could not get up... so usually, i'll attempt to make a sudden movement of my hand or jus jerk myself up... then it'll go away... sounds scary? i always experience that leh! hmm.....

yea... on tues, it came again... noises... high pitched mumblings of i-dunno-what... i got myself up, then slp again, and it came again... this time, laughter... high pitched laughter... laughing AT me... and in it, I shouted back at it "Stupid evil one, just go away! I show you that i'll successfully fast tmr... then u'll shutup forever!"... hmm... i woke up wondering why i spoke that way... that noise, was jus laughing...

in anycase, it jus made my will stronger to realli fast on weds, for the retreatants...
come weds, there were MANY times i forgot i was fasting... and when i saw my fren with waffles, i nearly want to buy one too... when my frens offered me food, i nearly took a bite... but thank daddyGod! he always manages to remind me in time! and He works thru my TH chiobu nurses too... cuz they'll say "oh sry, i forgot u're fasting again..." when actually, i myself forgot too! so they reminded me =) love them!

[Dear daddyGod, you truely work in wonderful ways! help me to grow to become a stronger girl, more disciplined and more independent... help me in my school work, tough stuff! help me to always seek your voice, in the midst of all the noise and bustle in my life daily... dear God, please also bless the people attending the retreat tmr, and for all the helpers and ministry members... Help us to never forget that nothing could be done without you and that we are merely fortunate instruments to be used by You, for Your glory! AMEN =)]

*CER8 goes in to my prayer list =)

this pic says "wahhh... lecture's starting in 5 mins..."

jus a preview! will post more next time...

gerry was here

12:31:00 PM

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Friday, February 01, 2008

*A minister passing through his church
in the middle of the day,
Decided to pause by the altar **
**and see who had come to pray.*

*Just then the back door opened,
a man came down the aisle,
The minister frowned as he saw
the man hadn't shaved in a while. *

*His shirt was kind a shabby
and his coat was worn and frayed,
The man knelt, he bowed his head,
Then rose and walked away.*

*In the days that followed,
each **noon** time came this chap,
Each time he knelt just for a moment,
A lunch pail in his lap.*

*Well, the minister's suspicions grew,
with robbery a main fear,
He decided to stop the man and ask him,
"What are you doing here?"*

*The old man said, he worked down the road,
lunch was half an hour.
Lunchtime was his prayer time,
for finding strength and power.*

*"I stay only moments, see,
because the factory is so far away;
As I kneel here talking to the Lord,
this is kinda what I say:*

*"I just came again to tell you, Lord,
how happy I've been,
Since we found each other's friendship
and You took away my sin.
Don't know much of how to pray,
but I think about You everyday.
So, Jesus, this is Jim
checking in today."*

*The minister feeling foolish,
told Jim, that was fine.
He told the man he was welcome
to come and pray just anytime.*

*Time to go, Jim smiled,
said "Thanks,"he hurried to the door.
The minister knelt at the altar;
he'd never done it before.*

*His cold heart melted, warmed with love,
and met with Jesus there.
As the tears flowed, in his heart,
he repeated old Jim's prayer:*

*"I just came again to tell you, Lord,
how happy I've been,
Since we found each other's friendship
and You took away my sin.
Don't know much of how to pray,
but I think about You everyday.
So, Jesus, this is me
checking in today."*

*Past noon one day, the minister noticed
that old Jim hadn't come.
As more days passed without Jim,
he began to worry some.*

*At the factory, he asked about him,
learning he was ill.
The hospital staff was worried,
but he'd given them a thrill.*

*The week that Jim was with them,
brought changes in the ward.
His smiles, a joy contagious.
changed people, were his reward.*

*The head nurse couldn't understand
why Jim was so glad,
When no flowers, calls or cards came,
not a visitor he had.*

*The minister stayed by his bed,
he voiced the nurse's concern:
No friends came to show they cared;
he had nowhere to turn.*

*Looking surprised,
old Jim spokeup and with a winsome smile;
"The nurse is wrong, she couldn't know,
that he's in here all the while!*

*Everyday at noon He's here,
a dear friend of mine, you see,
He sits right down, takes my hand,
leans over and says to me:*

*"I just came again to tell you, Jim,
how happy I have been,
Since we found this friendship,
and I took away your sin.
Always love to hear you pray,
I think about you each day,
and so Jim, this is Jesus
checking in today."*

gerry was here

11:36:00 AM

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